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SEASONS

by autumn kids.

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1.
i didn’t see these demons ripping out my happiness sometimes i’m still blindfolded and i still let them use me one day i will die and my soul will fade but until then i'll love what's close to home i say goodbye to this wreckage i say goodbye to myself breathe in // breathe out // repeat i wish you’d say goodbye
2.
Uncertainty 03:21
i can't find the strength to say “everything will be ok” because I cannot lie that way let me fall to the ground that shows my past and let me lie there drenched by the rain which tastes like blood to me there's a knife inside my back and my life is twitching it slowly i can’t find the strength to say that “everything will be ok” minutes become hours, hours become days and i've never felt more alone I've buried my head waiting for the day but there's no happy end happy end i need to find a mirror just to see the cracks of what I am or what i could have been with every breath I take i'm getting weaker and my lungs fill with water and i try every second not to drown but sometimes i'm losing my grip and i'm afraid you'll do the same
3.
as we were growing up we both learned that life will take us where we want to go but i don’t know if i'll make it without you sometimes I’m asking myself if it was right to run away but a part of me feels confident i’m afraid that the distance will tear us apart but some things will never change every night i’m trying to forget these memories and i’m trying to focus on the good things you did to me i’m so far from home and i’m counting down these days i hope you’ll be waiting waiting i’m sick and tired of fighting against myself i’m telling myself “i need some time alone” just for a while just for a life for so long I listened to these have heart songs waiting for the day to stand up and scream at the sun i’m not ready for this life to end i keep fighting for my friends for my friends. every night I’m trying to forget these memories and I’m trying to focus on the good things you did to me i’m so far from home and i’m counting down these days i hope you’ll be waiting waiting thank you
4.
this house had so many rooms i tried to find a way outside you always complained about the cigarettes they were the only thing that burned my demons inside tell me about my mistakes I’m listening i’ll be fine
5.
do you still see light in this empty room? is it easy to say life goes on? recurring dreams, i want to see what they mean i hope they'll mean something before we leave i cannot bear it anymore to see myself in the mirror i'm lost in memories and i know that they'll never come back do they even have a value for you? when everything is meaningless? if I could catch the stars, i'd let the deepest black disappear "why do you think about a life when you can't see clear?" you said because even when i'm broken i'm longing for rest i lie awake every morning but the ghost of this room, he knows my fate do you still see light in this empty room? i take a walk through the forest of youth but i see the shots of light when I hear your voice i learned to say that I'm fine but that is my biggest lie i walk through the deep black sea just let me sink, let me sink. if life's a journey, i'm not ready for it
6.
Drowning 04:37
i fear not the dark but the outside feel free from my life at night i leave for places I could never reach i hope we'll meet again when I close my eyes and we're getting closer just for a few seconds before I barely ask you for your name i try to sleep because i've lived here for so long and i try to hold on in my dreams, the only place i feel i belong i am locked in my apartment i am free from this birdcage of mine you dig a grave for me called hell the only way out is when i close my eyes you can see me drowning in the rivers of misery i'm sinking and sinking and sinking i search for you through the deep black sea in hope that it will bring you back to me i try to sleep because I've lived here for so long and i try to hold on in my dreams, the only place i feel i belong the dreams i belong

about

music & lyrics written by autumn kids.
between march 2017 and december 2018

recorded, mixed & mastered by jörg deubzer @ hdf recordings

credits

released March 1, 2019

adrian: drums
basti: guitar
patrick: guitar
marvin: bass, vocals
davis: vocals, synth

cover art by tamara grünwald
tammyg.de

special thanks to mirko hüttmann, hannes markisch, georg cotta, michael marketsmüller, jörg deubzer & tamara grünwald

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all rights reserved

tags

about

autumn kids. Germany

Wistfulness, despair, rage.

Friends who make music together.

Always Antifascist.

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